Relationships

15 Resolutions For Single Ladies Looking For Love In The New Year

Being single during the holidays can be tough and might make you even more motivated to find love in the new year!

By Ella Carroll-Smith4 min read
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The holidays are an undeniably romantic time of year. There's a chill in the air, mistletoe hanging in unassuming doorways, and chestnuts roasting by the open fire. All of it makes you want to cozy up with someone special. Plus, going to holiday parties alone when all of your friends are in relationships can be depressing. Not to mention those family gatherings where your nosy aunt keeps hounding you about why you're still single. 

While there is zero shame in being single, sometimes it can make you feel like you’re stuck in a rut – especially if the majority of your friends are married or in relationships. If you're determined to make next year different and really want to find love in the new year, here are some resolutions that will help you do just that. 

1. Open Yourself Up to New Experiences

First things first, make sure you’re entering the new year with the right mindset. Think positive, and be open to new experiences. Saying yes more means you’ll have more opportunities to grow as a person and meet new people. 

2. Date with Intentionality

It’s no secret that casual dating and hookup culture are extremely harmful to women. If you’re dating to find long-term commitment, act like it. Don’t go on dates with guys who aren’t serious and do not sleep with a guy right off the bat. Ask questions, hold the men you date (and yourself!) to a high standard, and be honest about what you’re looking for. 

3. Make a List of Your Must-Haves in a Potential Partner

What do you want your future relationship to look like? What things are the most important to you in a potential husband or boyfriend? Make a list of those things so that you have a clearer idea of what you want and what you’re looking for. 

4. Re-Examine Your Deal Breakers

This does not mean lowering your standards. There are some deal breakers that are perfectly reasonable, such as shared values or a sense of humor. But there are some shallower deal breakers that you may want to re-examine. Does he really have to be six feet tall and speak two foreign languages? Re-examine your deal breakers to determine which ones are important and which are just “nice to haves.”

5. Get Out of Your Comfort Zone 

It’s all-too-easy to get stuck in the confines of your comfort zone, but part of putting yourself out there means stepping outside it as much as you can. Some radical ideas are things like sky-diving or trying stand-up comedy, but it can be smaller too! Maybe for you this just looks like finally walking up to that cute guy at the gym and saying hi. 

6. Change Up Your Routine

Are you sensing a theme to this list yet? It’s all about trying new things, especially new things that will potentially open you up to meeting new people. Instead of stopping at the same Starbucks you always go to, try a different one. Or better yet, try that cute new local place on the corner that you’ve never been to before!

7. Take a Cooking Class

You know that saying “the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach”? Well, it turns out it’s actually true! Learning to cook is about more than just making a man happy though, it’s also a great way to grow your skills, get creative, and eat delicious and healthier food in the process.

8. Go to a Social Event Where You Don’t Know Anyone

For us introverts, the idea of going to a party where you don’t know anyone is terrifying, but it’s another great way to get out of your comfort zone and meet new people. If you’re nervous, a good tip for going to parties alone is to switch up your mindset. Don’t focus on how you can make yourself more at ease, focus on how you can make other people feel more comfortable. Doing this will help you act more extroverted, ask people better questions, and make people like you more. And the best part is that you will actually feel more comfortable in return!

9. Travel Somewhere New

It doesn’t have to be Paris, but taking a trip somewhere new is a great way to grow your independence, get out of your comfort zone, and meet new people! Traveling to new places and experiencing new things also makes you a more interesting person. You’ll have better stories to share on dates or with loved ones. It’s also just plain fun to travel, and just because you’re single doesn’t mean you can’t have fun. 

10. Create Better Habits

You want to find love in the new year, yes, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t continue to work on yourself! Quite the opposite actually. You want to find a great guy, right? Well then you need to be a great girl! That starts with creating high-value habits that will help you live a higher-quality life.  

11. Take Yourself Out on a Date

Who says you need two people to have a great date? Make a reservation for a party of one at a nice restaurant, put on a dress you feel great in, and take yourself out to dinner! Doing this will help you feel more confident in yourself. And if people stare, let them! 

12. Smile at Strangers

I’m convinced that part of the reason it’s so hard to meet people “in the wild” these days is because we’re all so consumed by our phones and don’t even look strangers in the eye anymore. The next time you’re walking down the street or standing next to someone in line at the store, smile at them! You never know where it might lead. 

13. Start Journaling

Writing your feelings down is the best way to get to know yourself on a whole other level. It’s also extremely cathartic – almost like a form of personal therapy. Start small! Maybe it’s only a few sentences a night.

14. Volunteer with a Local Organization 

One of the keys to happiness is doing things for other people. Volunteering with a local organization will help you give back to the community, feel a sense of gratitude for the things you have, and meet other people who have similar values. 

15. Find Peace in Solitude

Just because you’re single doesn’t mean that you need to be unhappy, even if you strongly desire a husband or a family. Use this time to become a better person, strengthen your bonds with your friends, and try new things. Everything changes once you’re in a relationship – especially after you have kids. Embrace your singledom while it lasts. This is a special season in life, so don’t take it for granted. 

Closing Thoughts

Finding love in the new year is about more than just swiping on a dating app or going to more parties in the hopes of meeting a guy. Take a holistic approach instead of a narrow one and start by simply opening yourself up more and being the kind of person you would want to marry if you were a man. 

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