So, you’ve officially reached that age where all your friends are either married or engaged. Your weekend plans are booked with back-to-back baby showers and 2 year old’s birthday parties, looking far different from the calendar you kept in your twenties. Being single in your thirties just hits differently…perhaps because it starts to actually hit you.
Your twenties were so vibrant, busy, and exciting, plus half your friends circle was still single so you didn’t really pay much attention. Yet, as you embark into your thirties, you’re starting to feel the effect of being the only single one left among your girlfriends.
While it can feel a little lonely at times or add unnecessary pressure to find someone ASAP, there are actually a lot of benefits to being single in your thirties you may be overlooking. In fact, there’s plenty of indulgent, fun, and empowering activities you can engage in that will enrich your life, add meaning, and keep you content while you wait for Mr. Right (because settling is never the answer!).
Here are 11 tips to find satisfaction as a single woman in your thirties (cue Beyoncé’s “All the Single Ladies”).
1. Join a Local Meetup
What are your interests or hobbies? Are you into hiking, yoga, poetry? Whatever it is, look into local meetups where you can immerse yourself in fun activities and meet other people who share the same passions. This is a great chance to form new friendships with people who are in a similar stage of life as you.
2. Expand Your Library
Okay, okay, you weren’t that girl who would stay home on a Friday night to read when you were in your twenties, but now your bed feels like it’s become the hottest night club. Make it part of your evening ritual to read a new book. So many women admit they miss this little luxury when they have a family to tend to and time becomes scarce. Your day will come, but for now enjoy expanding your library and indulging in a good read. Plus, you’ll always have something interesting to talk about!
3. Focus on Your Career
If you’re a career-driven woman, this is an excellent time to advance on your goals. Utilize this time where you only have to balance your own schedule and livelihood to earn that promotion you’ve been eyeing, excel at a new position, or jump to a new career all together. Being a single professional is a perfect time to find what you’re truly passionate about and take more risks. It also makes you marketable for travel opportunities that your hitched colleagues may be unable to attend. It could bring exciting new endeavors your way! And who knows, you may even meet your Prince Charming at one of those conferences.
Being a single professional is a perfect time to find what you’re truly passionate about and take more risks.
4. Indulge in Self-Care Routines
Want to take a nap in the middle of a Saturday afternoon? Pop in a chick flick before bed? Or soak in a bubble bath after dinner? No problem. Your schedule is free to be conducted however you please. Make self-care a top priority!
There will come a day when you’ll wish you had this time back, because alone time will be rare, and possibly only reserved for bathroom breaks, when you have a house filled with family. Immerse yourself in this space where you can truly get to know yourself and find comfort in your own company.
Being unattached at this time also means you can go wherever, whenever. If you have dream destinations pinned all over your Pinterest board, it could be a transformational experience to begin checking some of them off your list. Expand your horizons, see new places, and learn new things. Compared to your twenties, you most likely have a little extra cash in your purse to spend, so why not make it memorable?
6. Have Fun on Dates!
Dating in your twenties can be…well…interesting. I think we can all agree we’re more self-aware and less available for drama in our thirties. You probably have a host of lessons under your belt thanks to your twenties that will keep you from making the same heartbreaking mistakes. Believe it or not, this can actually make dating a lot more fun! You may notice you don’t encounter (or exude) as many immature behaviors as you did when you were in your twenties. While these dates may not result in a happily ever after, it’s always lovely to meet new people and enjoy a delicious dinner while doing so.
7. Move to a New Town
If you’ve been contemplating new scenery for a while or feel you’ve outgrown your current environment, this could be your opportunity to move! Where do you feel called to go? Plan a weekend getaway to a variety of locations to get a feel for different spots and receive clarity (this also makes for fun vacations in the meantime!).
Loving your living space makes a vast difference in your overall well-being and productivity levels.
8. Make Your Home Beautiful
We tend to think we have to wait until we own a home or have a family to dedicate any time or money towards beautifying our living space. But why not start embracing your style now? Loving your living space makes a vast difference in your overall well-being and productivity levels. Plus, it can be really fun and freeing to invest in décor that you’re obsessed with. They’ll make great additions to your family home someday.
9. Establish the Habits You Want To Have
Once a husband and kids enter the picture, their schedules and needs will need to be accommodated too. Take this phase of life to decide what habits are nonnegiotables for you – daily exercise, monthly social commitments, taking your vitamins, whatever it may be – and focus on really solidifying them, so in the future when you’re feeling pressed for time it’s easier to keep up your healthy habits.
10. Get a Pet
If you’re combatting loneliness, it might be time to get a pet. A cat or a dog will give you someone to talk to (besides yourself) and something more alive and interactive to love than your houseplants. Plus, it’s been scientifically proven that petting a dog reduces cortisol levels and raises oxytocin.
11. Buy the Shoes!
Last, but certainly not least, buy yourself the shoes, the dress, or the latte. When you’re only budgeting for yourself, it leaves some room for splurges that you may otherwise have to pass up. Without guilt, let yourself accept these moments and enjoy them.
Self-discovery, self-awareness, and self-confidence all play a large part in finding a healthy relationship and creating a stable marriage. Instead of rushing into a relationship just because you feel behind according to society’s clock, see this time for what it really is: a chance to get to know yourself on a deeper level. There’s no shame in taking time in your thirties to enhance these traits to the fullest.
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