Looking back at my single Valentine’s Days as a married woman has given me a new perspective. There were many years that I hated this day because it felt like a reminder that I didn’t have anyone to celebrate with. I spent many years single because I simply hadn’t met a guy that I felt was worth my time. Casual hookups are not my thing – I was looking for husband material, and it just took him a while to show up in my life. For anyone who’s in the same boat, let me encourage you that not all hope is lost – you will eventually meet the right guy, and he is worth the wait! All your married Valentine’s Days after that will be everything you hoped for.
But until then, let me give you some inspiration for how to celebrate your Valentine’s Day as a single woman.
Yes, you read that correctly. Don’t celebrate the day at all. If you let yourself make a huge deal about the day and the fact that you’re single, then it will feel like a big deal. But you have the power over your own mind. If this day feels like a drain on your energy, take the day off social media and just skip it altogether. Maybe pick up an extra shift at work, or volunteer your time somewhere. Or just go home and treat the day as if it’s just another day. Save yourself the unnecessary grief and give yourself a break. You're single, so what? Skip the entire thing and save it for when you have someone worth celebrating it with.
Or, Do the Opposite and Make a Huge Deal of the Day
Who am I to tell you to skip Valentine’s Day? Maybe you look forward to every holiday you can get, and you want to celebrate! Fine! Do it! Treat yourself and do all the things that make you feel loved! Get yourself some flowers and chocolate, go out for a yummy dinner solo or with a girl friend, and spend the evening doing whatever makes you happy. Maybe light some candles, take a bubble bath, and watch a movie! Or dress up and go dancing!
One of the best parts about being single is that you have complete control over what happens on this day. When you get into a relationship, you secretly hope that your boyfriend or husband can guess what will make this day special, and sometimes they just don’t get the hint. But you are in charge when you’re single, so do whatever you want!
Celebrate with Your Family
Even to this day, my mom usually has us over for dinner around Valentine’s Day. She decorates with candy hearts and balloons, and we usually end the night with dessert. Sometimes, I look forward to this more than whatever my husband and I decide to do for the day. I can’t share my mom with everyone, but you can still plan something like this with your family. Ignore all the sappy Instagram posts from your friends in relationships, and embrace spending it with the ones you love.
Can you imagine how excited your family would be if you initiated spending this day with them? Maybe it’s your parents, grandparents, siblings, or all of them. Get everyone together who is available, and make it fun. Put on some music, order or cook a good dinner, and eat some chocolate. Not to make this fun article something dark, but I just attended a funeral (okay, sorry, that feels dark), but it's a good reminder that we never know what can happen, and we should make the most of the time we have with the people we love! These will be heartwarming memories to look back on.
Go Out with Your Other Single Girlfriends!
Sometimes it can feel like there are no other single people around, but usually we have at least one single friend. Call her up, and celebrate together! A great way to forget you’re alone is to literally not be alone. Be around other people. If you want to go all out, then put on something fancy and go somewhere nice. Or you can keep things chill, and just hang out at home and have a movie marathon or game night. Celebrating with friends is so valuable during this season of life because eventually you won’t have as much availability to spend time with them when you’re married!
If there were ever a pro at being single, it was me. Now that I’m married, I guess I can no longer claim the title, but I spent many years not in a relationship. I went to weddings and family gatherings alone and took trips by myself. You can’t stop living life because you don’t have someone to go with you everywhere. This phase of life is so important for finding who you are and what you enjoy, and it will help you be your best self in the next phase of life. So this Valentine’s Day, spend it however you want, with whoever you want, or don’t acknowledge it at all. You are in control!
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