Relationships

Do These 5 Things To Get Your Man To Say Yes To You More

By Hannah Leah··  6 min read
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Listen, ladies, it’s easier than you think to negotiate with your man. Honestly, he’s probably more willing to do something for you than you realize.

Women are complicated – we can be emotionally driven and we’re more complex in certain ways than men are. Men really just want to be respected and loved. But sometimes we overcomplicate things or focus on what our husband is doing wrong more than what he's doing right, and it comes across to them as nagging. If we can learn to communicate with them in the right way, they’re usually more than happy to make us happy. 

What is it you want from your man? Most of the time, it isn’t a material thing that they are saying no to, though sometimes it can be. But usually the disagreements come from wanting more quality time, more emotional response from them, more romance, more acts of service, or simply them understanding us better. These things aren’t always clear to the men in our lives, because they’re not built the same as us. If you want them to respond in a more positive way to you, consider these things. 

Choose Your Battles

If I could give my younger self some relationship advice, I would say not to sweat the small stuff. It’s easy to let the little things bother us, because even little things can make us feel like someone doesn’t care, but in the grand scheme of life, it’s really not worth the constant bickering.

dancing boxing ring

My husband treats me really well. And what I have realized about him is that he is super easy going. I can ask him for just about anything, and he is willing to do it if it makes me happy. I used to pick fights over miniscule things because I hold him to a high standard, as I have high standards for myself in our relationship. But I realized that just nagging him about everything only made him feel like a failure. In the end, it wasn’t worth it to argue over things that don’t actually matter. If you choose your battles, then when it comes time to ask for something, they know it matters to you.

This is not a pass to let your boyfriend treat you poorly. You can date anyone, so why date someone who doesn’t treat you right or act like they care? But once you find that special someone, then have a little grace for the flaws, because you'll need the same grace in return. 

So he forgot to take out the trash again. Is it really worth a huge blow-up fight to yell at him about it? Sometimes it's easier to let the small stuff go. Take it out yourself and gently remind him next time that you really appreciate when he does it for you. "It's so heavy and you're so strong" should work just fine.

happy people dont shoot husbands

Praise Them for the Things They Do Right

Just like they feel like a failure when we’re nagging them, they feel respected and appreciated when we praise them for the good things. We shouldn’t critique them without also giving them recognition for their success. Even if it's something small that they did, make sure they know you noticed. That positive affirmation will give them motivation to continue to do more of those things. All of us appreciate recognition for the good work we do. 

brilliant well done simon cowell

Learn To Communicate

Remember, men like simple. Have you ever seen the TikToks where someone catches a guy on his phone, reading a longggg paragraph from his girl, and he looks exhausted just reading it? Sometimes we go in circles when trying to communicate our feelings to him, and afterwards, he is still confused. We want him to hear our feelings, and respond with his feelings. But guys are less emotional. They are problem solvers and it’s not their natural instinct to express their emotions.

dramatic keyboard typing yellow

So, when communicating with your man, try to be clear and direct. It’s okay to tell him how you feel, but don’t be upset with him for not always returning the same emotions. If you would like something from him, it’s best to just say it. They don’t always pick up on the hints that we drop and they certainly can't read our minds. If you need him to just listen and not try to fix it, tell him that. If you need him to listen and then try to fix it, tell him that. Chances are he'll be relieved to know exactly what you want from him in that moment.

Say Yes to Them Too

Don’t forget that they have needs too. If he wants to go hang out with the guys once a week, don’t hold him back or be resentful when he returns, or if he wants to buy a car part occasionally, let him. You can’t expect to get what you want all the time and never let him do things that make him happy. And if you love your husband (or boyfriend), this shouldn’t be an issue. It’s human nature to be a little selfish, but in a relationship we have to think of the other person, just as we expect them to think about us. 

a super yes from me

Enjoy Your Time Together

So much time is wasted nowadays. The more valuable time spent together as a couple, the more you understand each other. If you can gain a mutual respect and understanding for each other, you will naturally be on the same page more often. Sometimes we get caught up in the little things and forget the big picture. Don’t take it for granted that you found someone you love that you get to do life with. If you can appreciate one another, you want to do things that make the other happy. 

jim pam laughing together the office

Closing Thoughts

We all have wants and needs, and in a relationship we have to do our best to accommodate the other person. We might not always understand each other, but we need to have grace for our flaws. Don’t forget that we’re all different, and sometimes men need us to be a little more direct with our intentions to realize what it is we’re asking from them. Do your best to communicate, and try to listen to their needs too. Relationships are a two-way street and as long as you're both working on improving your communication and being the best person for your partner, you're setting yourself up for success.

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