12 Small Things Women Enjoy That Beat An Extravagant Date Any Day

By Meghan Dillon
·  5 min read
shutterstock 1780593266 (1)

If you’ve ever seen a romantic movie (or dating show like 'The Bachelorette'), you’ve probably seen a plethora of over-the-top romantic gestures.

While these gestures are nice, sometimes it’s the smaller things that make us feel loved. So we asked our readers for the best things a boyfriend or husband can do to make us feel valued. Here are 12 of the most common answers:

1. Being on Time

This is especially true for the first date (it’s already anxiety-inducing enough, why make us wait any longer?) and matters through the rest of the relationship. It might seem like an almost trivial thing, but being on time shows that he respects you and values your time together. It’s a small way for him to show that he cares and that you’re a priority – and everyone likes to feel valued.

2. Respecting Sexual Boundaries

Setting sexual boundaries is important, and it doesn’t go unnoticed when guys respect them. It shows that he values your needs above his own and wants you to be comfortable. If a guy doesn’t respect your sexual boundaries and pushes you to do things you’re not comfortable with, run as fast as you can – that’s a blatant sign that he’s only in it for himself.

repsecting each other

3. Making Coffee in the Morning

If you’re married, it’s safe to assume that he loves and cares about you, but small gestures of affection are still appreciated. Making your wife a cup of coffee in the morning before she gets out of bed is one of those small gestures that is not only greatly appreciated but can be even better than breakfast in bed.

4. Listening

After a bad day, sometimes we just want to vent without any commentary or advice. Venting itself can be therapeutic, but it only works when someone is willing to listen. This is such a simple way to support your partner (it’s just as important for women to listen to their husbands and boyfriends) and shows how much you care and value them.

marilyn monroe talking

5. Taking Care of Her While She’s Sick

This point always reminds me of Fever Pitch, where Jimmy Fallon’s character went to pick up Drew Barrymore’s character for their first date, only to discover she had food poisoning. Instead of rescheduling, he spent the night taking care of her and helping her clean up. This was an immediate green flag that he was a good guy because he sacrificed his evening for her in less than ideal conditions. It’s also sweet in marriage because it shows that you take the “in sickness and in health” line of your vows seriously.

6. Remembering Her Favorite Things

Receiving flowers and candy is always nice, but it’s so much better when it’s your favorite flowers and favorite type of candy. It’s a sweet way for a guy to show that he was listening, and it’s always sweet to think of the extra effort that went into picking out the gift. It makes the flowers smell prettier, and the candy taste better.

giving her flowers

7. Planning a Date

While low-key dates like movie nights are fun, it’s always sweet when a guy goes out of his way to plan a date. Whether it’s a night game to see your favorite baseball team or a trip to your favorite museum followed by dinner at your favorite restaurant, a planned date is such a nice way to feel known and appreciated.

8. Respecting Her Family

This may seem like a no-brainer to many, but anyone who has been in a relationship with someone who disrespects their family knows the difference it makes. From getting to know family members in the early stages of dating to asking your dad for his blessing to propose, there’s nothing better than a man who respects your family – it shows that he values family and will likely make a great father one day.

mr knightley where does it matter where i live

9. Taking on Some Household Chores

When you’re married, it’s easy to fall into a routine and respective roles. This can lead to many women taking on the majority of household chores, so it’s always nice when a guy goes out of his way to get some of your chores done without you asking. It’s so simple, but it shows that he values your time, notices all you do, and gives you a little break.

10. Going to Therapy

Unfortunately, there’s a stigma against men going to therapy. Whether it’s couples therapy or personal talk therapy (literally anyone can benefit from therapy), it’s a mature way for him to work on himself. We’re not suggesting that you pressure him to go to therapy when he doesn’t want to, but his going to become a better man is admirable.

office michael scott therapy

11. Be Consistent

Ups and downs may be fun on rollercoaster rides, but not in relationships. Though everything in life naturally has its ups and downs, we all seek comfort in the small routines in life. Being consistent in these simple routines (even if they’re as simple as saying “I love you” every day or always sharing something you’re thankful for) is a beautiful way to show that you care, and that you’ll always care.

12. Be There for Her During Difficult Times

Difficult times like losing a family member are inevitable, and being there for someone while grieving can help. Even if you’re in the early stages of a relationship, a simple “I’m here if you need to talk” shows how much he cares. If you’re married or have been together for a long time, it’s even more important to step up during these times. Small gestures like cooking dinner or taking extra time to get the cleaning done means the world when you’re grieving.

soft kitty warm kitty sheldon

Closing Thoughts

While a little extravagance never hurt anyone, it’s the simple things that make us feel valued because they show us how much a man cares. From remembering favorite things to respecting boundaries, sometimes small gestures really do beat out fancy ones.

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