Masculine Dads Raise Strong Daughters

In today’s world, the term man is said to have a multitude of definitions and the term masculinity has been vilified for its supposed associations with rape, women’s oppression in academia and the workplace, and archaic (and somehow offensive) notions of chivalry.

By Molly Farinholt3 min read
Shutterstock/Hrecheniuk Oleksii

There’s a prevailing notion that strong women will only emerge if masculine men are forced into the shadows. The influence of masculinity, however, is vital to the upbringing of strong and confident young women. 

Feminism Discourages Healthy Relationships between Males and Females

Feminism preaches that women should never be beholden to another — especially if that other is a man. Instead, women should claim their independence with strength, at the expense of relationships that could guide, support, and protect. Husbands who embrace the role of protector and provider are anathema. And fathers who offer love, wisdom, and counsel are seen as the very hindrance to female autonomy. But the feminists have it all wrong.

Masculine fathers don’t oppress their daughters or prevent them from thriving in the world. 

Humans are relational beings. We’re not meant to stand alone as islands in a tumultuous sea. We need others. We can’t thrive without good and loving relationships. When we first enter the world, we’re given the gift of immediate kinship with those whose union formed us. We’re connected in a physical way to our parents, but, more importantly, we need and desire an emotional connection with them. The structure of a family — as it is intended — fosters the greatest growth in children. A mother nurtures, while a father illuminates the path into an often confusing and treacherous world. Both roles are necessary. 

Feminism seeks to throw this structure off-kilter. The removal of the father creates an imbalance that can only leave a child feeling incomplete and disoriented. Without the presence of a strong male figure, young girls won’t be shown the merits of healthy masculinity. They won’t feel confident and safe in an unpredictable world. They won’t understand their dignity in the deepest sense possible. Masculine fathers don’t, as feminists would have you believe, oppress their daughters and bar them from that which will enable them to thrive in this world. On the contrary, they instill in their daughters all that’s needed to become a woman confident in her identity, her abilities, and her worth. 

Masculine Fathers Model How Men Should Behave

Masculine fathers show their daughters what they should expect and demand of men. By modeling what it means to be a man — one who guides and protects, stands for what is right, and loves sacrificially — they impart to their daughters both the knowledge of what they should look for in a future spouse and the confidence to never settle for anything less. 

I could never marry a man who didn’t possess the virtues of my father.

Growing up, I knew that I could never marry a man who didn’t possess the virtues of my father. I kept my standards high, choosing to remain the “single friend” for most of my high school and college years. A man who didn’t shake hands firmly, give up his seat for women, and stand unwavering in his convictions was not worth my time (and he would never get past my parents’ front step). Ultimately, my strict standards led me to my husband and the father of my daughter — a man who, like my own father, exemplifies all of the desirable qualities of masculinity

Masculine Fathers Teach Their Daughters How To Be Resilient

Masculine fathers help their daughters to feel secure and prevent them from falling prey to our culture of victimhood. Society makes it very easy and even fashionable to claim the status of a victim. We’re told that our feelings should never be hurt in the slightest way and, if they are, we must wail and moan until someone does something about it. This never accomplishes anything. 

My father showed me how to deal with hurt and find strength in moving past it. 

Confidence, resilience, and skin thick enough to withstand the sometimes unfriendly outside world, however, will get one far in life. These are all traits of one raised by a masculine father, for such fathers will always ensure that their daughters know how to combat the ills of the world. They offer protection, but also the skills necessary to protect themselves. My father would and will always stand up for me, but he also taught me that, sometimes, life isn’t fair. He didn’t tell me that I would never be hurt, but he showed me how to deal with hurt and find strength in moving past it. 

Masculine Fathers Support the Dignity and Worth of Women

Masculine fathers help their daughters to understand their identity as a female and, by loving them as such, demonstrate to them their great dignity and worth. My father never encouraged me to act in the way boys do — even on the basketball court. He did, however, always inspire me to conduct myself as a young woman who was capable of great things. I’ve never felt the need to “stand up to the patriarchy” because my father showed me the great worth of a woman — and how she’s complementary to man (and vice versa). 

My father always inspired me to conduct myself as a young woman who was capable of great things.

The way in which my father treated my mother proved to me that real men don’t view women as the lesser sex; they view them as different, yet equal, and treat them as such. They recognize their innate beauty and goodness. They understand that the world would be lost without women. Often, my father would joke that he “raised a sexist.” Of course, what he truly meant was that he raised a young woman who understood the difference between the sexes and how this difference is beautiful, wonderful, and life-giving.

Closing Thoughts

As my daughter grows, I would never want my husband to tuck away his masculinity so as to attempt to empower her as a young woman. Rather, I’m grateful knowing that he will be a strong and loving figure in her life. He will, just as my father did, show her that real men and real women don’t stand in opposition of each other; they act in harmony, lifting each other and society to greater heights. My daughter will know that, as a female, she’s strong in her true identity and can offer this world great things. Most importantly, she will know that she’s loved by her father. 

In the vain quest for independence, feminism robs young women of this great love. This is a crime so terrible and detrimental to women for, in the end, one can’t be truly strong without love — especially the selfless, unconditional love of a father.