In a world where female empowerment revolves around denouncing masculinity, we tend to overlook the crucial role men play in society and fail to recognize how much a young girl needs a strong father.
A girl needs a strong guiding force, a father who shapes her young mind and helps her attain a life of stability, acceptance, and genuine love. Her sense of worth is rooted in him. Don't think so? A 2018 psychological study found that more than half of female inmates came from a father-absent home.
A 2018 psychological study found that more than half of female inmates came from a father-absent home.
We are regularly fed false information on the toxicity of masculinity and how threatening it is to women and their success. We've been conditioned to question the impact of a man in our life and fail to realize how our father's behavior strongly impacts our development and well-being.
It's no coincidence that since society has abandoned traditional values and roles, we have seen an outpouring of self-love campaigns. It's not because women are now more empowered, but rather their self-love and self-worth are diminishing.
It's not because women are now more empowered, but rather their self-love and self-worth are diminishing.
1. His devotion and discipline sets us up for success
Fathers are typically the disciplinarians. He sets the boundaries and rules we need to face the demands of the real world. We must be capable of making mature, sensible decisions, and through his love, his boundaries help us do just that. They provide us a sense of order, hold us accountable for our own decisions, tame our natural impulses, and teach us cooperation. While his boundaries are valuable, there is much more to a father's role.
We assume girls idolize and emulate their mothers. It's from her that we learn the tricks of the trade, but it's our father's presence that our prosperity is dependent upon. It's not just his physical presence that leaves an impact, but most importantly, the mental and emotional devotion he presents to us.
It's not just his physical presence that leaves an impact, but most importantly the mental and emotional devotion he presents to us.
It was just over a decade ago that Barack Obama gave his Father's Day speech, during which he said, "We know the statistics – that children who grow up without a father are five times more likely to live in poverty and commit crime; nine times more likely to drop out of schools and twenty times more likely to end up in prison."
Children who grow up without a father are five times more likely to live in poverty and commit crime.
2. His approval affects our self-esteem
From a young age, women naturally seek approval and acknowledgment from men. When we receive approval from our father, we gain a sense of confidence in ourselves, our abilities, and in our decisions. Experiencing this often will greatly deepen our self-esteem. Trusting ourselves to make decisions will open up opportunities to make more decisions that bring us success.
Approval can be experienced in many ways, including support, encouragement, acknowledgment, and recognition. When we fail to receive this approval, we find fault within ourself. We will continually blame ourselves for things out of our control, and our self-confidence will dwindle.
When we fail to receive this approval, we find fault within ourself.
A lack of approval from our father will eventually drive us to seek approval from other men. With low self-esteem, we are willing to gain validation from unworthy men. A strong father wants and knows what is best for his daughter, and his approval guides her down the right path.
Validation from others may be given for selfish reasons and could result in self-deterioration. Our self-esteem should not be determined by another man's opinion of us. A father can control the approval his daughter receives. A strong father hands it out often, deservingly, and with good intentions.
3. His affection determines our modesty
Women crave affection. Our sense of security relies on it. A lack of touch signifies we're not accepted, cared for, or we are doing something wrong. Promiscuity typically stems from a lack of affection at home. Our father, being the first man we encounter, is the subconscious force that makes us determine how we portray ourselves to the world.
When left longing for this affection, we often attain it in the quickest, easiest (and most unfulfilling) way possible. At this point, we're not looking for long-term fulfillment, so we will settle for short-term satisfaction from men willing to satisfy this desire. To him, not only will we expose our body, but also the weakness in our heart.
Our father's affection shows us that he recognizes, appreciates, and approves of us. If we truly see value in ourself, we won't resort to promiscuity to obtain love and affection. Our attitude, behavior, and physical appearance will reflect our confidence and self-worth. A girl will not need to expose her body to gain the attention and affection she craves since men will be drawn to her for the value she sees in herself.
4. His behavior toward women affects our self-respect
At a young age, it's crucial for us to witness our father treating women with respect. A strong father appreciates his wife's femininity and compliments her role in society. As children, we notice this behavior and view it as the norm. When he embraces a woman's femininity, we recognize that it's okay to be sensitive and emotional, it's okay to depend on others for help, and it's okay to love your authentic self. Knowing that we are genuinely accepted and appreciated will teach us that women have great value and are to be respected.
When observing him treat our mother with respect, we learn what we deserve from other men. We are less likely to deal with mistreatment in our relationships because we know we are worthy of so much more. From our father, we learn how a man is to make us feel - that we are valued and protected. When we feel anything less, our self-respect drives us to stand our ground and either find or demand better. A good father instills an intolerance for bad men.
A good father instills an intolerance for bad men.
5. His devotion to us will help define our relationships
As much as our mother does and provides for us, she cannot be the positive male role model that we need. Our experience with men is ignited by our father. We learn what men are and how they act based on his actions. We rarely question his behavior because we don't know any different. He shapes our perception of normalcy, and serves as the benchmark we'll compare potential future husbands to.
He shapes our perception of normalcy, and serves as the benchmark we'll compare potential future husbands to.
Many women measure every man they pursue against their father. We compare their values, demeanor, and capability to lead. Through our father's strength, we learn the greatness of masculinity, how it balances out and appreciates our femininity.
6. His emotional fulfillment helps us to avoid emotional dependency.
A strong father doesn't destroy, abuse, or take for granted our delicate qualities. Our father teaches us how to express and receive love. He forms our mental capacity for dealing with relationships and conflict, processing feelings, and expressing concerns. When lacking this relationship with our father, we tend to turn to other men for emotional support.
7. He teaches us not to settle
People say we tend to pick our future partner to resemble our parents. So when our father shows support, respect, forgiveness, and love, we won't settle for less. Certainly, we are observant and capable enough to recognize the faults in our father and not allow them to impair our relationships. However, it's still our father's actions that teach us right from wrong, and we may be forced to learn the hard way.
Today's society attempts to normalize and celebrate single parenthood because we want to empower those going through it. And while encouragement for single mothers is a must, it's dangerous to go against our nature and perpetuate the lie that fathers aren't important.
While it's absolutely possible to flourish as a woman without a father, there's no doubt that the struggles and obstacles these girls face will be immense and may stick with them forever. Despite what we are told, we wouldn't have strong women if it weren't for strong men.