We Asked Our Husbands How They Knew We Were “The One”—Here’s What They Said

Most single people have looked at married couples and wondered, “How did they know?” And if you’re a single woman, you might mostly wonder how the husband knew this was the woman he wanted to marry. What were the qualities he saw in her that made him decide to go out and buy a ring? What did he love about her uniquely? What made her the woman he chose to propose to, over all of the other women he dated?

Obviously, it’s sweet to hear a guy reflect on what made him choose the woman he married, but if we’re totally honest, it’s practical too. It’s helpful for single women who want to be someone’s wife one day to know what will make a man think to himself, “She’s wife material.”

And we wanted to help answer those questions for you. We had the married writers of Evie and our married readers ask their husbands how they knew she was “the one” – here’s what they had to say.

How Our Husbands Knew We Were “The One”

“I knew when I met your parents and saw how family oriented you were and how you treated one another. It made me realize that I want to build a family with you. We also had shared values in terms of how we approached family and treated others.” - Gina’s husband 

“When we started dating, it wasn’t like other relationships I’d been in. Sure, it was new, exciting, and fun. All those boxes were ticked, but that’s not unusual when you are in the early days. The difference is, those quickly fizzle out over the time it takes for the relationship to run its course. Ours never fizzled out, and each day just got better than the last. We were always excited to see each other, even if it was just to do nothing. How did I know she was the one? It was something so simple but something that no other girl had done before: She would always call me when she got home from a night out with her friends or if she was working late, even if it was just to say she was home safe. Other girls would maybe text, or I’d hear from them the next day. But Stephanie was different. She’d keep in touch. I remember calling a friend of mine and telling her how Stephanie would call and text me, even when I least expected it. She told me, ‘That’s because she likes you.’ And it turned out she really did.” - Stephanie’s husband

“First, yes, I was attracted to you. You were the prettiest girl I’d laid eyes on. But there are a lot of pretty girls in LA. Beyond my physical attraction, there was a combination of things in addition to your beauty that I hadn’t found with any other woman I’d come across. You were smart and deep, willing to talk about the big questions of life and ponder them seriously with me. But also, you were fun and silly, both of which were non-negotiables for me. With all that in place, what sealed the deal was that we shared the same dreams and vision for the future. When I saw each of these things fall into place, I knew you were the girl for me.” - Keelia’s husband

“It wasn’t just one thing, it was many things. I’m very analytical, and you checked off all the boxes. For example, your faith is important to you like it is to me, I knew you would be someone who wouldn’t cheat on me, you have good spending habits, you’re family-oriented, and you appreciate the things I do for you. I knew I could wake up to you every day and never get tired of you.” - Hannah’s husband

“I was out with some friends junior year of college, and we had a good time, called it an evening, and started heading back to our dorms. On the drive home, I was very antsy and couldn’t relax. I realized it was because I didn’t want to be there, not because of them (I liked my friends a lot!) but because more than anything, I just wanted a life where I knew I was coming home to Alicia.” - Alicia’s husband

“I just liked who you are, we wanted the same things, and I knew I could trust you to be a good partner to build our life together. It wasn’t a specific moment, I just figured it out as we spent time together.” - Claire’s husband 

“When I first saw you, it was like everything was in slow motion, like the movies! I felt an instant connection to you; I couldn’t explain it, but I knew you’d be my wife.” - Selena’s husband

“Front porch test – could he picture sitting on a porch together old and grey? He could.” - Kelsey

“Three months in, he just couldn’t imagine us not getting married. It felt right.” - Grace

“He told me my strength and confidence reminded him of his mom. Not in a creepy way.” - Jordan

“He knew I wouldn’t embarrass him and that I would be a good mother to his children.” - Sarra

“When I first met her, I just knew, ‘This is my wife.’ That simple. With her, I realized that my soul had been incomplete up until that moment. With her, everything else in my life made sense.” - Grayson’s husband

“It was drama free and uncomplicated. From the start, it was loving and respectful.” - Anne’s husband

“All of our values aligned, he was attracted to me, we had fun together, and I could dress.” - Caroline

“He says he knew because being with me made him want to be a husband and dad.” - Erica

“He says I’m the woman that ‘challenges him in a way that creates growth.’” - Kelsie

“I wore tennis shoes on our first date. He said he knew I wasn’t high maintenance and the one.” - Clarissa

“You were a combination of understanding, mature, and took an interest in me.” - Alanna’s husband

Closing Thoughts

Sometimes it’s easy to pinpoint, and other times, it’s a little more ambiguous as to how exactly he knew she was the one. But from these quotes, there are more than a few ideas on how to become a woman that’s wife material.

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