In Defense Of The Bro Archetype

I grew up in an upper-middle-class suburb outside of Chicago and went to college at a state school with a party reputation, so it's safe to say I've known bros my entire life. Sure, some are douchebags chasing the next girl who will jump into bed with him to affirm his ego while he brags about his trust fund, but these types were the minority.

Most bros I knew in high school worked hard in both academics and sports to earn a scholarship because even if they came from a wealthy background, their parents wanted them to learn the value of hard work. In college, most of my guy friends liked to turn up on the weekends, but wouldn't dream of coercing a woman into doing something she didn't want to do or taking advantage of a woman while she was drunk. Sure, there were outliers, but any man with a backbone shunned them once their true colors came to light.

In postgrad life, these bros work hard during the week to build a future for themselves and spend weekends blowing off steam at bars, attending sporting events, and participating in rec leagues during the summer. Some embrace the f-boy lifestyle, but the vast majority who do are more than happy to give it up when they meet a woman they want to start a life with.

In an age that loves to demonize masculinity in all forms, many like to view these men as villains, even though they’re just living their lives and embracing their interests. How did this media archetype come to be, and has the demonization of this archetype contributed to our culture’s ongoing mental health crisis?

The Bro In Pop Culture: Is It Accurate?

While some pop culture archetypes, such as the femme fatale, can be traced back thousands of years, the bro is a relatively new phenomenon. Its origins can be traced back to the ‘70s, where it was used for a young male to refer to another one of his male friends. One of the first pop culture depictions of the bro was in the 1978 film, Animal House.

The iconic film tells the story of fraternity brothers who go head-to-head with the Dean of their school, who wants to kick them off campus for their poor grades and inappropriate behavior. The film paints the fraternity brothers as degenerate and wild, yet hilarious and charming. The trope evolved in the ‘80s as the antithesis to the nerd archetype, creating the plot for Revenge of the Nerds. In the 1984 film, fraternity brothers and star athletes are the bros who torment the nerdy computer science majors, eventually leading to an all-out war between the two groups.

Revenge of the Nerds is an early depiction of showing star athletes (who quickly got grouped into the bro archetype alongside guys in fraternities) as the bullies in high school and college-centric popular media. The trope persisted through the ‘80s and ‘90s, but 1999’s Varsity Blues painted a more complex and nuanced version of the archetype. This tradition continues throughout the 2000s with shows like One Tree Hill, Friday Night Lights, and Greek. All three shows start with the bro as the typical douchebag, but later show the complexities of the characters that make them more sympathetic and relatable, proving that an archetype is just that—an archetype.

While high school and college movies aren't as popular as they used to be, one of the best portrayals of the bro archetype in this context from the 2010s is Neighbors. In this raunchy comedy, Zac Efron plays Teddy, a fraternity president who appears to be a typical douchebag. As the story progresses, it’s revealed that the douchey persona is a facade to cover his insecurities. In the end, he turns out to be a genuinely nice guy who's slightly immature and insecure.

When popular media depicts the adult bro, they focus on young men who refuse to grow up (famously known as Peter Pan Syndrome) or trust-fund brats who think they’re better than everyone else because of their (parents') status. What pop culture doesn’t always show is the bro who graduates college, gets a good job, and develops a healthy relationship with a woman that eventually leads to marriage while maintaining his male friendships and traditionally masculine interests. While this is a far more common experience among American men, it doesn’t always make for entertaining media.

The White Lotus features an adult bro every season, and they’re always insufferable. In the first season, Shane is a spoiled, rich, overgrown man-child (with an Oedipus complex, of course) who lets his entitlement ruin his honeymoon, and possibly his marriage. In the second season, Cam is a narcissistic finance bro who constantly cheats on his wife, treats women like they’re objects, and believes he’s better than everyone else because of his wealth and status. Season three gives us the most nuanced portrayal with Saxon, who starts as a sex-obsessed finance bro hooked on his next ego boost and dopamine hit, but realizes there’s more to life than his selfish desires when he meets Chelsea. Chelsea appears to be the only woman to ever reject him, but the friendship they develop teaches him that he wants genuine relationships and a more meaningful life.

The Bro Represents Healthy and Positive Masculinity

Perhaps I’m biased since I’ve had a lot of positive experiences with bros in my life, but I’ve also had plenty of negative experiences. Having these experiences has shown me that there are positive and negative aspects of bro culture. Some negatives are a strong sense of entitlement, a misogynistic attitude towards women, an intense focus on their selfish desires over anything else, and general immaturity. While these behaviors are red flags, the good news is that they’re relatively easy to notice and that many (hopefully) outgrow them with age.

The positive aspects of bro culture are a sense of loyalty to friends, leadership, strength, and courage. Many of the guys I knew who embodied these traits were the guys who liked to party in college, but also worked hard in school, made time for their friends and family, and always logged in their volunteer hours.

It’s easy to make fun of gym bros online, but few acknowledge the hard work that it takes to be one. As Thomas Adamo of Stanford Review writes, “This online ‘gym bro’ movement seems to be also framed largely around finding male community, filling a desire to find a group identity with other men.”

He continues, “This ‘gym bro’ culture is a way for men to take a step towards a healthy masculinity that promotes physical fitness and better mental health. However, the 'gym bro' lifestyle is not exclusive to men, women too can benefit from the same sense of community, physical health, and discipline.”

It’s no secret that we’re currently in a mental health crisis, and many argue that masculinity discourages men from asking for mental health support when they need it. While this argument has some validity in how masculinity values stoicism, research suggests otherwise.

According to the UK-based Centre of Male Psychology, a series of 58 studies from 1978 to 2021 finds that masculinity is linked to lower rates of depression. Further research also shows that men who view masculinity in a negative light are more likely to have poor mental health. It’s important to note that the masculine traits associated with lower rates of depression isn’t the toxic kind that the media loves to preach about, but focuses on traits like “being independent, active, competitive, makes decisions easily, never gives up easily, self confident, feels superior and stands up well under pressure.”

While many laugh at the narrative that there’s a male loneliness epidemic, there’s truth in it. The demonization of masculinity often groups positive aspects of masculinity with the negative, subconsciously making us think that masculinity as a whole is toxic. This contributes to men struggling with their mental health, often having higher suicide rates than women.

Now, what does this have to do with bro culture? Perhaps the bro represents the negative side of masculinity, but he also represents the positive. Men who embrace traditionally masculine interests like working out and sports find community in their gyms, rec leagues, and their friends in fantasy leagues. In a culture that preaches about mental health awareness, shouldn’t we be encouraging men to pursue these interests if it benefits their mental health?

Mental health aside, it’s no secret that women are attracted to traditionally masculine men who embody the positive traits of masculinity.

Why Women Love The Bro (When He Grows Up)

While there’s nothing quite as attractive as a fratty bro to a college-aged woman, immaturity gives adult women the ick. The caveat is that they are still attracted to bros, but only when they grow up. The two best examples of men like this are Glen Powell and Travis Kelce.

Sure, Glen Powell looks like the average bro when he goes on stage and shotguns a beer while wearing a backwards hat at a Luke Combs concert, but he’s so much more than that. He’s driven to succeed, hardworking, passionate about what he does, adores his family, and looks handsome while doing it. Him having traditionally masculine interests like football and working out doesn’t negate any of that, and his not caring about what others think of him just makes him hotter.

Similarly, women can’t get enough of Travis Kelce. We know women love athletes because their strength and work ethic show they can be good and protective providers (sometimes attraction really just comes down to evolutionary psychology), but not every athlete is Travis Kelce. He was a legend in his own right before he started dating Taylor Swift in 2023, but the way he put himself out there by saying he made her a friendship bracelet with his phone number on it on his podcast shows an objectively sexy level of confidence.

He and his brother Jason’s podcast, New Heights, is popular among both men and women for many reasons, but one is that they both embody the typical Midwestern bro. They love to drink beer, joke around, and talk about sports, but they’re appealing because they’re handsome, funny, hard-working, talented, and seem like genuinely nice guys. While one could argue that they have an immature sense of humor, they’re more mature where it matters in their work and personal lives.

The past few years have seen the downfall of the soft boy and the rise of the hunk, proving that women love masculine and bro-y men when they display healthy masculine traits like leadership, strength, courage, resilience, and a strong work ethic. This proves the problem isn’t masculinity, but the negative sides of masculinity. In a time where women are unashamed to embrace their femininity, it only makes sense that they’re attracted to masculine men. Girlie girls and bros are the perfect representations of feminine and masculine archetypes. Many view femininity and masculinity as polar opposites, but the two complement each other like yin and yang. If we can celebrate femininity’s comeback, why can’t we celebrate masculinity’s return as well?