Whatever the reason, good wives make sure to use good manners with their husbands. It makes a huge difference.
Sometimes our manners slip. It’s understandable. Whether we’re exhausted from work, kids, or taking care of a home and other adult stresses, it’s difficult to remember pleasantries when we’re having a rough time. Sure it’s easy to be nice and polite when you’re having a great time, but how we behave when we struggle truly displays our depth of character.
It’s also easier to smile at the old lady at the grocery store and help her get that can she can’t reach because we don’t see her every day. The people we love most and share our life with need to be at the forefront of our best efforts, but unfortunately, sometimes we take them for granted.
Extend Common Courtesy to Your Husband Too
Your husband is standing in your way in the kitchen. Do you slide around him, passive-aggressively move closer, or say “Excuse me”?
It may seem silly, but common courtesy easily slips when we grow comfortable with each other. Comfort sounds nice, but it’s a few steps away from taking your better half for granted. And it’s not that difficult to say “please” and “thank you.” Pleasantly asking your husband to please do a chore is much more likely to get a good-tempered and timely response. Thanking your husband when he takes out the trash or stops at the grocery store on the way home indicates his actions were noticed and appreciated.
Good manners communicate attention, respect, consideration, love, and gratitude.
These simple words and phrases exist for a reason. They communicate attention, respect, consideration, love, and gratitude. They signal that you view your husband as a competent adult and not as a child you can order around. They’re easy to use when put into practice and just make the recipient feel good. Extending common courtesy isn’t just good manners, it’s a good marriage practice.
Your Husband Deserves Visibility
It doesn’t matter how bad your day was. It doesn’t matter if the baby spat up on you 25 times, or if you went to work and dealt with the meanest boss in the universe, you still need to smile and greet your husband when you see each other after being separated.
When he comes home from work, or even from just working in another room for a while, a simple “Hi, honey” works, but sometimes you need to wrap your leg around his and have a makeout session like you did when you were dating. Make him a nice lunch or just bring him a sandwich every once in a while (without asking him if he likes it or sticking around to watch him eat it like some weird food voyeur). Special credit to comedian Bill Burr for that little tip.
There are times when just sneaking into his man cave – or wherever he plays video games or unwinds – to rub his shoulders and steal a kiss enhances your love, but pick your timing. You don’t want to be standing at the door when he’s going to the bathroom or anything too annoying, but remembering to acknowledge that his presence matters to you is a good wifely practice.
Be Civil, No Matter What
You’re having a fight. It’s getting heated. You’re so mad you just want to throw away his favorite ugly chair. But that won’t solve anything.
It’s easy to get caught up in your emotions during a fight, but no matter how angry you are, it’s essential that you be civil. This is the man you love. You might not always like him, but your love will still be there when the anger subsides.
The modern myth that if someone loves you, you can say or do anything to them, is a very destructive belief.
This is also a good rule for little moments. When you’re having a rough day and everything is getting to you, don’t take it out on him. Just because you’re married doesn’t mean you can be unfiltered. There is this modern myth that if someone loves you, you can say or do anything to them, and that is a very destructive belief. Your actions and words can hurt your spouse and your marriage, so mind your manners, especially when you’re struggling. That’s what they’re made for.
Manners are not just for strangers when you leave the house. They should always start at home.
Politeness is more than just offering a greeting or remembering to thank others when they’re nice; it’s a lifestyle that incorporates kindness and understanding into everything we do with everyone we interact with. It’s not a chore meant to be checked off a scorecard, it’s a commitment, much like the one you made to the man you love. He deserves to receive the best of you no matter what.
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