We're Focused On Outer Beauty Because We Have Nothing Else To Offer

To prepare for the Miss Universe 2019 competition, the beautiful Gazini Ganados (Miss Philippines 2019) sat down with Boy Abunda for some Q&A polishing up. If you’re familiar with pageants, you’ll know about the famous Q&A portion, where you’re asked about a hot topic and expected to give a satisfactory answer within a minute. And it was in this setting that Ganandos was asked a question that hit me in a way many questions usually don’t. It was in this setting that Ganandos was asked a question that hit me in a way many questions usually don’t. It wasn't your typical "should marijuana become legal" or “what do you think about the American economy” type of question. It was less political and more cultural. Or perhaps, that’s just how it sounded to me. The original question may have been, “Is it possible for Beauty Queens to win (Miss Universe) without an advocacy?” But mentally, I’ve broadened it out: Is it possible for a woman to rely on her physical beauty and do away with values? That may sound ridiculous. Shallow, even. But think about it. The multitude of body acceptance movements and the rise of certain Instagrammable trends show the state of mind most of women are trudging in. We say with our lips that it’s important to have character, but we’re more focused on whether or not someone with our waist size is getting enough front-cover love. While many women fight for those rights and their causes should be respected, I’m more concerned with the lack of virtue promotion. Without an advocacy, a woman’s values aren’t at the forefront. And if her values aren’t at the forefront, then her physical appearance is. And if her physical appearance is...then there's a problem. There are tons of beautiful women out there, and beauty is subjective. You can’t rely on your physical appearance as your crutch. You can’t rely on your physical appearance as your crutch. Why We Need Values It’s through our values that we not only differentiate ourselves, but also strengthen our character. We can establish our worth as people. Values give you a sense of purpose. That sense of purpose shouldn’t be taken lightly; it’s your source of life. You know, that irresistible glow that unconsciously draws people closer to experience your energy. Femininity may look different on all women, similar to all humans having different fingerprints, but one thing we can all relate to is that we need a set of virtuous values to benefit most from life. Values give you a sense of purpose. Values are not only the standards you hold yourself to, but what you expect from others as well. We’ve all heard it before: the crisis of being unable to find a partner or a friend to confide in. This could be battled if we knew ourselves and what we wanted from a friend or a partner. The Truth about Blandness The farther we stray away from proper education on virtues (whether it be from school, church, family, or even media), the less knowledgeable we are on who we are. Which makes sense...if you don’t know what you hold dear, how much do you truly know yourself? On top of that, how much of yourself could you really express? Take a look around you. At your coworkers, your colleagues, your schoolmates. And, terrible to say, but even some of your family members. Blandness is everywhere. People are just existing. They walk through life as if they’re bored, waiting for something to happen to them, or barely taking note of what passes them by. As a lover of life, it should sting when you see this...because everyone is capable of sharpening their flavor. No one is naturally bland. They just start in the wrong place. We hardly start with our why , but instead skip directly to prioritizing our physical appearance. We hardly start with our 'why', but instead skip directly to prioritizing our physical appearance. If you want to avoid coming off as bland, you’ve got to give reasons to love yourself. You’ll notice your worth especially when you really pinpoint what you hold close. So…What Kind of Values Are Worth Having? Now with a spiral of differentiating political dogmas, lots of different cultures, and unwritten laws about what is socially acceptable, it isn’t always clear what is considered virtuous. It really feels like there isn’t an objective main moral standard that most women can trust. It really feels like there isn’t an objective main moral standard that most women can trust. See, that’s tricky...we all come from different walks of life, and depending on where you live, you’ll prioritize certain things over others. But if there happened to be a general consensus on values worth having, I’d say the best bets would be: Generosity: To connect with people and nurture relationships. Integrity: To show up as your best self. Loyalty: For your family and friends. Courage: To see the silver lining of any experience. Conclusion Values aren’t something reserved for beauty queens or celebrity philanthropists. They’re something we should all clearly identify for ourselves. When we focus on only enhancing our physical beauty, we miss the mark and cheapen our worth. There’s so much more to a woman than what she looks like, and if you could find a way to shine your beliefs out, you’ll attract opportunities and relationships that couldn’t have come with just a nice frame and a pretty smile.