Warning Signs Of A Controlling And Abusive Man, According To A Domestic Violence Specialist
As a social worker specializing in domestic violence, rape, and sexual assault, I’ve had a front row seat to the beginnings and endings of so many romantic relationships that may have started out as fairytales but quickly turned into nightmares.
Oftentimes, clients will tell me that their abuser was “perfect” during the early days of their relationship, “the ideal guy,” but if we dig a little deeper, there are usually a few red flags present that can indicate whether or not a person will sooner or later exhibit abusive behaviors – be they physical, mental, emotional, or psychological – towards their partner. It’s also important to note that while abusers are people too, their abuse is less motivated by how they feel in the moment and more by how they think. (These behaviors, and much more, are explored in Lundy Bancroft’s Why Does He Do That? Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men, which I can’t recommend enough as a DV specialist.)