The Homeschooler Stereotype Is Dead. Here's What Replaced It

In her new book, " Skipping School: A History of American Homeschooling and How It Went Mainstream ," American historian and homeschooling mom of four, Dixie Dillon Lane, traces homeschooling from its countercultural roots in the 1950s to its modern-day position as a postinstitutional norm. By taking a close look at particular families who homeschooled during each decade, alongside demographic research on who chooses homeschooling and why, she illuminates an ongoing and passionate battle for parental control in education. What Lane found in her research is that homeschoolers are far more diverse than many stereotypes suggest. “To put it succinctly,” she writes, “the new homeschoolers were not weird, and their beliefs were not fringe. They were operating within a significant norm, rather than counterculturally” (p. 149). Not only that, but homeschoolers are often highly engaged citizens as adults. They're more likely than average Americans to perform community service, participate in civic organizations, vote, and contact elected representatives (p. 89). Homeschool students also consistently outperform public school students on standardized testing. And homeschooling has continued to grow. By 2024, “the Census Pulse survey suggests that just over 6.5 percent of households were homeschooling” (p. 157). With numbers like that, you probably know at least one homeschooler yourself, or maybe it’s you who’s homeschooling or planning to homeschool someday. While Lane’s research addresses many common concerns about academics and socialization, I wanted to ask her a few broader questions about homeschooling’s recent rapid growth, its uniquely American roots, and what its mainstream acceptance might mean for the future of education. First, I have to ask—how did you possibly write a book while homeschooling four children? I think a lot of women struggle with the fear that having children (let alone homeschooling them) might mean that they have to sacrifice aspects of their own dreams, yet here you are totally defying that narrative. What did that process look like for you and your family? The short answer is: it just took me a really long time! I began the research for this book in 2009, before I was married or became a mother. And then over the coming years I went through transformation after transformation. Life with young children is demanding in a minute-to-minute way, and it's joyful and hilarious and hard. But here's the thing: so is writing a book. So I suppose the maturation chamber that is early motherhood prepared me for the moment when my youngest was out of diapers and I thought to myself, "Hey, I should start writing again." Having children has absolutely made me a better thinker and writer, and so has time itself. It's easy to be tempted to blame motherhood for slowing things down, but in truth, some things just take time, whether or not children are in the mix. Becoming a good writer is one of those things. You can't skip any steps with this. So you may as well do it while kids are laughing and fighting around you. You write that homeschooling has grown increasingly diverse in both demographics and motivations since the 1990s (p. 6). How would you say that the increasing variety of homeschooling styles contributes to this diversity? There have always been many different homeschooling styles, and very often people of different styles have been able to be friends and work together (see the homeschool Substack I run with two of my own friends, for example). But one thing that is relatively new is the level of support a family can receive in its homeschooling from schools, whether they are public schools or homeschool academies or co-ops. Homeschooling doesn't require the amount of parental oversight and engagement that it once did (although lots of families, including mine, still homeschool in a highly parentally-engaged way). That's actually really different—you can, essentially, have someone else oversee your kid's homeschooling. Homeschooling doesn't require the amount of parental oversight and engagement that it once did. One result is that homeschooling can actually provide some childcare in the way that a brick-and-mortar school does, rather than requiring the near-constant presence of one parent. And of course, parents have many different choices now for curricula, so if a parent wants something to implement at home (rather than coming up with it on their own), that's an option now. So in some ways, getting started is a whole lot easier than it used to be, and that may make it feel more open to different lifestyles and family situations. But it also makes it less obvious exactly what “homeschooling” means, since it can mean wildly different things to different people. Many young mothers interested in alternative parenting or wellness trends are also encountering homeschooling influences online. What impact do you think these social media influencers have on families considering homeschooling today? I think that the most important thing for women watching influencers to remember is that homeschooling does not sit outside of the economy. Many influencers are wonderful people with great ideas that help a lot of their audience. But they’re also often marketing to you—don't forget that! And what they love and what works for them may be great, but it also may not be a good fit for you, and that's 100% okay. Take what seems good to you and leave the rest. And I would say, pay more attention to influencers who make you feel calm or excited but also like you can problem-solve, rather than making you feel like you’re not doing anything right. Don’t let yourself be made anxious by someone who is freaking you out about what curriculum you should buy for your three-year-old! They don’t know you well enough to know exactly what you and your children need. Since the early days of homeschooling in the 1950s, homeschoolers have embodied a pioneering, entrepreneurial, and independent spirit that is uniquely American. Do you think that the very task of homeschooling requires families to have a bit of pioneering boldness? I think it used to require that, but I don't think it does as much now that it's become so widespread. That has really changed the vibe of homeschooling! But homeschooling can still be a very innovative and creative experience if you want it to be. I myself love the process of trying things out, observing my children and myself, and solving problems. It can be really fun and is a great intellectual and interpersonal workout. And it's not just about the kids—you can do educational things together that are interesting to you, too. In the book you mention that you personally had a great experience in public school growing up. Some critics argue that the growth of homeschooling contributes to the decline of public schools by taking some of the best students and most engaged parents out of the system. How would you respond to that criticism, and what did your research reveal about it? "Great" is maybe too strong a word for it! But yes, I did all right with my public school education, and I did have a lot of good experiences in public school. I think, however, that the objection you mention is based on a mistaken assumption that parents have a lot of influence over their children's schools. If that were true, they might be able to help strengthen them and also help problem-solve when their own children run into trouble. But too often today (and there are exceptions), that's not the case. Today, parents are often held at arm's length by schools, and sometimes they are literally locked off of school campuses. Classroom decisions come down from on high, and pedagogies and curricula fail to teach literacy and numeracy adequately to the average student. It's not a student-first environment in which parents and teachers work together to figure out what the local children need. So although a parent may be able to affect her own child’s behavior—get the child to do homework, be respectful, etc. (which not all parents will do!)—she can’t necessarily problem-solve or influence the school situation. So instead of engaged parents and willing students having a large positive influence on schools, more often they are just frustrated and under-served by those schools. I would add that many teachers find this frustrating, as well—they can't make decisions in their own classrooms. Homeschooling can actually help increase pressure toward positive change in public school systems because it prevents these systems from being the only game in town. On the other hand, homeschooling can actually help increase pressure toward positive change in public school systems because it prevents these systems from being the only game in town. We saw how much that frightened public schools during the COVID-19 pandemic, when some school districts exhorted parents not to educate their children themselves during the lockdown for fear that those children would be ahead of other kids when school resumed in-person. This argument—that the best thing is for all children to fall behind, rather than for some to pull ahead—was obviously absurd. If we want all children to do well, we need to have the chance to try out alternatives when the normal processes are not working. One of the striking things in your book is how fluid homeschooling has become. Families can move in and out of homeschool depending on a child’s needs or season of life. Do you think that flexibility is beginning to complicate how we define who is a homeschooler and who isn’t? Yes, it is certainly already complicating definitions. Homeschooling is always in flux and so is its definition. Many people who consider themselves homeschoolers don't count as such in state registration laws, and many who don't consider themselves homeschoolers do count under some definitions! So it's a bit of a mess. It's a problem for demographers and politicians (and writers like me), but it also goes to show how flexibly we can think about education if we want to do so. There are many different ways to get an education, and that's probably a good thing. Throughout homeschooling’s history, there is a recurring tension between homeschoolers fearing institutional pressure and institutions fearing the growth of homeschool itself. What would need to change for public schools to feel less threatened by homeschoolers? Public schools vary in their performance (and in many other ways) from state to state, town to town, and even neighborhood to neighborhood. So you have schools that are loved by most local parents, and schools that aren't; and you also have schools that have good relationships with homeschooling, and schools that don't. But in terms of the threat homeschooling poses to public schools, the main thing at play is money. When schools receive funds based on enrollment or student attendance, a significant local growth in homeschooling will change the budget in ways that matter. And teacher hiring, classroom sizes, and other decisions also relate directly to enrollment in many cases. So I would say that either the way that schools are funded would need to change, or the quality of schooling would need to improve. If public schools in most places in the country were safe and academically adequate environments for most children, I think there would be less conflict, because more parents would feel that they could choose between two goods—public school and homeschool—rather than that they had no real choice. As homeschool has grown, so have the homeschooling options, which you note can even feel limiting to some parents (p. 137). What would you say to a young mother who loves the idea of homeschooling but feels overwhelmed by all of the choices? Take a breath! Just start slow and simple, and don't buy all the big expensive curricula at once. It will take you some time to find your groove, and that's okay—that's even good! There's no "one right way" to home school. That's just companies using your anxiety to try to get you to make purchases! And definitely find some older homeschooling parents locally to go to for advice. They will have seen a thing or two, and can usually help you figure out what's really a problem for you and what's not. You also need some good homeschooling friends whose kids are around the same ages as yours; laughing together with friends can make all the difference on a hard day. There's no "one right way" to home school. Most of all: Don't let anxiety get in the way of slow and steady enjoyment with your children! You describe parental authority as “the one essential of modern homeschooling” (p. 60). Do you think concerns over the perceived “wokeness” of the current public school system have inspired parents to reclaim a greater sense of authority over their children’s education by homeschooling? I don't think homeschooling parents as a whole would agree with that statement; homeschooling is far too diverse for that. It's actually quite interesting, because some parents homeschool because they object to schools' progressive social agendas, for example, but others homeschool because they think schools are too conservative! So I really think it's less about "wokeness" or anything else, and more about parents just wanting to be able to pass on their own values to their kids. And when schools do take on a flavor that does not reflect dominant local beliefs (or strongly-held personal ones), parents find that problematic. In my own circles, I feel like I know more moms who homeschool (or say they will when their kids are old enough) than who have chosen public or even private school for their family. Do you think since your research in 2024 that there might be even more of a homeschool boom that’s yet to be documented? Homeschooling is definitely still growing! We know from recent data that it has continued to grow since 2024, and I expect it will do so for a while yet. We'll have to see—there are a lot of factors involved in school decisions, of course. What in your research, if anything, surprised you? I suspected that homeschooling was diverse, but I had no idea how diverse. Homeschooling rates among non-white families are especially striking. Homeschoolers in America really are demographically like everyone else these days. Could be me—could be you—could be anybody. And that tells me that it's not just a fringe idea. It's certainly not something everyone must or ought to do, but it is something that is deeply and broadly American. What is next for you as a writer and homeschooler, and where can people find more of your work? People can check out my book here and can keep up with my work through my Substacks, The Hollow and The Bad Moms Homeschool . I'd also encourage readers to check out Hearth & Field , where I'm an editor. As for what comes next, well, we shall see! As I've gotten older, I've become more relaxed about following the path that rises up before me instead of trying to turn myself emphatically this way and that. I've got some great writing and editing projects underway, and we'll see where those lead me! And as for homeschooling, our eldest will be at a private high school again next year, but the other three will be at home again. We'll keep discerning over time what is best for each of them and for our family as a whole. It isn't always easy, but good things rarely are, and we're really grateful for every minute we get to spend together.