I Can't Wait To Lose My Last Name

As tradition holds, the couple is announced as "Mr. and Mrs." for the first time, before walking down the aisle as a newly married couple through a crowd of their friends and family. However, as the video shows this couple being introduced for the first time, the bride shoots the officiator a death glare . The bride corrects the officiator, and he takes a deep, sorrowful sigh before re-announcing the couple. While the husband's name remains, she proudly clings to her maiden name, giving a slight eye roll that suggests the notion of taking her husband's last name is completely idiotic. It's hard not to feel bad for her. On what should be the happiest day of her life, the day when she and her husband become one, she is instead preoccupied with keeping her autonomy. In front of all of her wedding guests, she chooses to be bitter and defensive. In front of her husband, she chooses her personal autonomy instead of allowing herself to fully embrace her marital bond. In front of God, she is rejecting the command that a bride should submit to her husband's authority instead of her father's upon marriage. Unfortunately, the practice of wives not taking their husbands' last names is growing. Women began hyphenating or keeping their maiden names in the 1970s and 1980s during the second wave of feminism, and the trend has only grown since then. A study of New Jersey birth records found that among married women who gave birth, the share who kept their birth name rose from 17% in 2000 to 39% in 2021. Nationally, the number of women who take their husband's last name is closer to 80% , though a 2025 YouGov survey found that 69% of married women say their current last name is one they took at marriage. That figure varies among age groups: Women, ages 18 to 49, are more than twice as likely to keep their own last names as those of previous generations. Education also impacts the likelihood of a woman taking her husband's name, as 26% of women with postgraduate degrees kept their last names. Twenty-five percent of liberal Democratic women keep their last name, compared with 7% of conservative Republican women. Ethnicity also plays a factor, as 30% of Hispanic women keep their last names, as opposed to 10% of white women and 9% of Black women. The practice of wives not taking their husbands' last names is growing. The rise in women keeping their maiden name is reflective of our culture. Marriage rates among young people have generally been on the decline for decades, largely due to a growing animosity toward the institution of marriage. In the 1970s, many self-proclaimed feminists began crusading against marriage. The writer Kate Millett wrote "Sexual Politics," which argued against marriage and against women changing their names. "[Women's] chattel status continues in their loss of name, their obligation to adopt the husband's domicile, and the general legal assumption that marriage involves an exchange of the female's domestic service and (sexual) consortium in return for financial support." Sheila Cronan argued in an essay that "it became increasingly clear to us that the institution of marriage 'protects' women in the same way that the institution of slavery was said to 'protect' blacks—that is, that the word 'protection' in this case is simply a euphemism for oppression ... The Women's Movement must concentrate on attacking this institution. Freedom for women cannot be won without the abolition of marriage." The war against marriage hasn't entirely worked, despite the attempts of radical feminists trying to "abolish" it. A majority of Americans still get married, and a majority of young people still say they want to get married someday (although the share of 12th grade girls who say they'll likely marry someday has fallen from 83% in 1993 to 61% in 2023 , while boys' expectations have barely moved). Still, there is a growing resentment of the traditional values that constitute marriage. Throughout the Bible, God explains what marriage is and why it's important. In Genesis 2:24, marriage is defined as the time when a man leaves his parents' household to "hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh." In Ephesians 5:32, it is explained that marriage "refers to Christ and the church," comparing the sacrificial love between husband and wife to that of God and His people. Marriage isn't a random social construct or a tax write-off; it's a profound blessing from God. It's part of His natural order. It's the primary institution from which all of humanity grows and blossoms. Not taking your husband's last name might not seem like a big deal, but it's a small way in which women undermine the sanctity of marriage. By keeping her maiden name, a woman is rejecting the combination of her flesh and her husband's into "one." It's a way to choose herself over her husband. It shows that she doesn't trust him fully, because she is choosing to allow that barricade to remain between them, continuing to divide them. God also teaches us that names are very important. In Genesis 2:19-20, God tasks Adam with naming each of the animals, showing that individual names are representative of the development of a meaningful relationship. When a bride is more concerned about her individual authority than her marriage, she doesn't understand the meaning of marriage. One of the main reasons women don't take their husbands' last names is that they're trying to preserve their personal identity. In professional settings, many women feel that changing their name will diminish the value of their degrees, their careers, or their public personas. Some women keep their maiden names to avoid the hassle of changing legal documents, like driver's licenses and bank accounts. Some women have claimed that they wanted to keep their last name to maintain equality in their marriage. All of these excuses fundamentally undermine the institution of marriage. When a bride is more concerned about her individual authority than her marriage, she doesn't understand the meaning of marriage. As ordered by God in Ephesians 5:22, wives are called "to submit to your husbands as you do to the Lord." As Christ is the head of the church, husbands are the head of the household. When women try to separate themselves from their husbands, they are subverting the institution of marriage. Perhaps I'm a bit biased. I can't wait to get married and change my last name, mostly because my German surname sounds an awful lot like "Gesundheit." When my mom married my dad, she had to get rid of her beautiful, historic last name, "Gallatin," and take on my dad's consonant-laden last name, "Brandtjen." Despite having a degree and a career, she never thought twice about taking her husband's name because she loved him. When you truly love someone, you sacrifice your personal pride to be joined in Holy Matrimony. It's not about the name or the initials or the court documents. It's about fully committing to your husband; it's about two becoming one.