Ask Evie: My Little Sister Is Getting Married Soon And I’m Worried Our Relationship Will Change. How Can I Manage My Expectations?

READER’S QUESTION: “Dear Evie, My little sister is getting married soon. My other sister is already happily married, and soon I will be the only single sibling. 

Recently, I have been preparing myself and doing my best to adjust to the new reality that now they both will be in new seasons of their life with a new set of priorities – as it should be for them. We have a very close bond, but I want to handle this season well. And I am unsure of what to expect in this new dynamic where I know my sister won’t be as readily available as she once was. How do I better prepare my heart and my expectations? 

I don’t consider myself to be a very needy person, but don’t want to be caught off guard emotionally when things will change (for the better). These are good things, so I want to navigate this well. Thank you.”

EVIE’S ADVICE: The situation you’ve found yourself in is extremely relatable, and the way you're handling it thus far – reaching out for advice to get ahead of it – shows just how much you care for and love your sisters. 

Many people struggle when those closest to them move on to the next stage of their life, whether that’s by getting married, having children, or getting a big job promotion. It’s understandable to feel left behind or like you’re unable to relate to what they’re going through. Since you mentioned that both of your sisters will be married after this upcoming wedding and you’re the only single sibling, it can be a little scary to think that you’ll have less in common with them than before or have different priorities and schedules. This is true to an extent, and it’s good that you’re anticipating somewhat of a change to manage your expectations, but the truth is that they’re still going to be your sisters at the end of the day. 

If you have a sister group chat, she will still be active on it (and if you don’t have one set up, now is the time!).

Your little sister will be spending more time with her new husband and setting up their home together, but she will still have time for you! If you have a sister group chat, she will still be active on it (and if you don’t have one set up, now is the time!). Staying in contact through funny memes, weekly life updates, or personal photos you’re not sharing on social media is a great way to feel connected to your sisters. Group texts are ideal in these scenarios because you can respond when it’s convenient for you rather than feeling like you need to be available 24/7 for a phone call to catch up (although, those are great on occasion too, especially if you’re going to be living farther apart now).

If you invite her to hang out with you, she’ll still want to – you might just need to work with her schedule since she’ll be taking her husband’s schedule into consideration too. You can take the initiative to text her or invite her out, but be flexible! She may be in the “honeymoon stage” of her relationship for a while after her wedding and want to prioritize more nights in with her new husband cooking and snuggling up on the couch, but she’ll still appreciate girl time (even more so as time goes on). 

Your sister has likely been dating this guy for quite some time already, so beyond moving in together, there might not be a whole lot that changes in her life in actuality. It sounds like you’re looking to be reassured that you’ll still have a good relationship with your sister after her wedding, and we’re here to tell you that you will. Beyond some minor changes, she isn’t going to become a completely different person overnight or ditch you because you’re in a different season of life than she is. 

Have a question you want our advice on? Email it to us at ask@eviemagazine.com.