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      10 Types Of Guys You Shouldn’t Date And Why

      By Keelia Clarkson·· 5 min read

      Looking for love these days can be a daunting task, and it’s tempting to jump into any relationship that presents itself.

      Dating in our modern age can be nerve-wracking. We set out with high hopes, but can often find ourselves wasting precious time with dead-end dudes. We all know to stay away from the kind of men our mom warned us about: the frat boy, the player, and the manchild. But what about the guys who are better at hiding their faults?

      Here’s a list of 10 guys you should watch out for as you look for love:

      The “Christian” Guy

      This guy has a bible verse on his Instagram bio, has a cross tattoo on his forearm, and shows up to church every single Sunday. But what you don’t know is he’s walking in with a hangover from a weekend of partying, preying on drunk girls, then confessing to his accountability partner.

      He uses this “good guy” facade so you’ll let your guard down.

      He reassures you with his “I’ll pray for you” comments, lifting his hands during worship, and the Christian rock music he plays in the car while he drives you back to his apartment. But he has no interest in actually walking the walk—instead, he uses this “good guy” facade so you’ll let your guard down.

      Signature pickup line: “I just feel like God wants us to be together.”

      The Uppity Intellect

      Typically found clutching an unopened copy of Plato’s Republic, this guy takes every opportunity to prove to you just how intelligent he is by either treating you like a kindergartener or quoting that one philosophy book he read a third of before he “got too bored.” He thinks being condescending is a form of intelligence, and it becomes obvious how much he loves the sound of his own voice as he pontificates. Initially, he seemed so deep, but pretty quickly, you realize all of his profound musings are copy/pasted from cliché dead guys.

      Signature pickup line: “Do you want to borrow my copy of The God Delusion?”

      The White Knight

      This one just hates the patriarchy, calling himself a male feminist—a true ally of all women (but mostly the ones he’s attracted to). He makes sure to share woke articles on the daily, believes in gender equality (especially when it comes to paying the check), and is a little too vocal in his support of #freethenipple.

      At first, he looks like a guy who really cares about equality, but in reality, he only cares about the kind of “equality” he gets something out of.

      At first, he looks like a guy who really cares about equality, but in reality, he only cares about the kind of “equality” he gets something out of.

      Signature pickup line: “Hey, didn’t I see you at the women’s march last week?”

      The Conditional Best Friend

      You know this guy, but not half as well as he knows you. He’s hung around for years, constantly tells you how beautiful you are, and how you deserve so much more than the guy you like right now. You’ve noticed him staring at you just a little too long sometimes, but you ignore it because he’s so “nice.” You graciously accept the awkward compliments and presents he gives you, hoping he also sees you only as a friend. But you have a sneaking suspicion he thinks you owe him for the gifts you never even asked for. And he totally does.

      Signature pickup line: “We belong together… just give me a chance.”

      The Brooding Bad Boy

      This leather jacket-clad, cigarette smoking, hair tossing boy might be a cliché, but boy does it hit us girls right in the "I-can-fix-him." Chaotic and unpredictable as he may be, there’s nothing like the feeling of catching his enticing stare. For a while, his impulsive energy brings a whirlwind of excitement to your life, but it ends up leaving a path of destruction and heartbreak in its selfish wake.

      Signature pickup line: “You got a light?”

      The “Someday” Guy

      The proud owner of a twin bed tucked away in his parent’s basement, this winner has big plans. He talks a lot about what he’s going to do, and somehow seems unshakably sure of the success his rock band, sci-fi novel, screenplay, food truck, ride-sharing app, or bitcoin investment (five years late) will bring. He seemed cool for a week or two, but after watching him play five rounds of Call of Duty in a row, you’re beginning to question everything.

      Signature pickup line: “Let’s hang out. I’m free literally any time.”

      The Nothing Guy

      He’s not ugly, but he’s not handsome. He’s not dumb, but he’s not deep. He’s not lazy, but he’s not driven. He’s not disagreeable, but he’s not charming. He’s not rude, but he’s not generous. He’s not really… much at all. He’s just kinda there.

      Signature pickup line: “Do you come to Panera Bread often?”

      The Good On Paper Guy

      Straight out of a 90’s rom-com, this one comes from a good family, has a good education, and a good haircut. He’s the ultimate safe guy, so falling for him seems like a no-brainer: he would bring security, stability, and order to your life. But despite your mom’s encouragement after seeing his clean-cut Facebook profile picture, you can’t shake the feeling that you’ll just become an ornament for his pristine life.

      Signature pickup line: “You should come to my family’s vacation house in the Hamptons sometime.”

      The Free Spirit

      Often found wearing a hemp shirt, jeans from fifteen years ago, and flip flops that look like they’ve seen better days, this hippie lives off of a strict vegan diet—and wants you to do the same because it makes him uncomfortable when you eat cheese in his presence. He only adopts animals from the local shelter, seldom cuts his waist-length hair, and really hates putting a label on relationships.

      For a while you’ll like his nonconformist ways, but this guy expects you to live by his unrealistic, ironically self-centered lifestyle.

      For a while you’ll like his nonconformist ways, but this guy expects the entire world (and you) to live by his unrealistic, ironically self-centered lifestyle—and before you can even break in the hemp sandals he made you, he’ll suddenly move to Brazil “just because” and assures you that your relationship was never exclusive anyway.

      Signature pickup line: “Can I buy you a kombucha?”

      The Lovesick Dictator

      This guy makes you feel so special with his grand gestures, consistent attention, and constant text check-ins throughout the day. It’s really sweet that he wants to be a part of everything you do, but when he starts getting mad because you took longer than an hour to text back on your girl’s night, doesn’t want you to go to a party because he can’t go, and thinks you’re too close to your family, you’ll start to feel suffocated pretty quickly.

      Signature pickup line: “I just met you, but I feel like we connect on a level no one else can understand.”

      Closing Thoughts

      The dating world can be tricky to navigate. Finding the right guy for you? Even trickier. I hope you found this article entertaining, but more importantly, informative. Happy hunting!


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