How To Embrace A “Hot Mom” Mentality

A hot mom is a woman like any other, so what sets her apart? Is it her rowdy brood of riled-up youngsters, her handsome if clueless husband, or how big her minivan is? Not necessarily, though that doesn’t hurt.

Here’s the thing: Moms have a certain moxy if you will, and they’re allowed to. They’ve done the hardest possible job there is, and their jobs don’t magically vanish once their kids are out of the house. For lack of a better word, their “jobs” don’t pay nearly enough, and they don’t end at five o’clock. Being a mom is a life-altering duty that is somehow never-ending, and for that reason, you might as well be the best hot mom you can possibly be. Embrace your inner superficiality, if only for a moment, and learn how.

Invest in a Hot Mom Disguise

Whether it’s your comfiest pair of jeans or your cutest sundress, make an investment in what you wear. This doesn’t have to mean a financial investment, but one of knowledge, and knowing what looks good on you and what doesn’t. Reject the notion that you should ditch your personal style when you become a mom. Sure, heels may no longer be practical for running errands (lest you have to sprint after one of the escapees), but you don't need to ditch your cutest dresses, blouses, or accessories. Should you be seen in Walmart in leggings and decade-old flip-flops (we all have those days), make others believe it’s on purpose and not a moment of temporary insanity. Dress in what makes you confident and helps you stand tall, and the hotness will be unleashed.

Invest in a skincare or barebones makeup routine as it will not only make you feel more confident in your own skin, but it's also a great excuse for a few moments of alone time in the name of self-care. It's time to glow from the inside out. You’re not just representing yourself, but your children and their father.

See and Be Seen 

If the place for the hot moms in your community to be seen is the local park, head there daily. If it’s Whole Foods, ditto (you don’t have to buy anything – one of the most attractive things a woman can do is window shop). Most of all, make other mom friends, and not ones that you secretly love to hate. Whether you have 30 things in common or nothing at all, make friends with other moms who have interesting perspectives to offer and who have kids who make good, wholesome playmates for your children. See and be seen, and let others enjoy your beauty.

Keep Up Appearances

Your toddler might need a reprimand at the park or your husband might need a stern reply at the corporate cocktail party, but never lose your composure in public. First of all, in this day and age, you’re likely to let one bad moment wind up on the internet through no fault of your own, and secondly, your kids or husband will take you more seriously if public embarrassment and humiliation are off the table. This isn’t about bottling up true feelings. It’s about keeping the inner workings of your family where they belong: at home.

Take Inspiration from the Greats

We all have those mothers we look up to, whether they’re our own or someone else’s. As mothers, we can strive to be good, nurturing, successful women even if we didn’t come from ideal homes by seeking to be the mothers that we didn’t have. When necessary, we can take inspiration from the best of the best, whether it’s your grandmother, sister, or a fictional figure you admire. Even Clair Huxtable or Sarah Connor had to put food on the table, after all. 

Reject the Cringe

We’ve all seen those t-shirts or mugs in late-night Instagram ads that read, “I need coffee for the things I can handle and wine for the things I can’t!” Ha ha! Not. The greatest affront to our inner hot mom is the existence of the cringey wine mom, the one who flaunts her dependence on alcohol and antidepressants, her lack of a sex life, and her chronically online confessions to millions of strangers that she’s let her small children become tyrants.

Contrary to the opinion of the current generation, being chronically online, sharing your deepest, darkest secrets that are left in perpetuity for your future adult children to consume, is not hot. It’s cringe, and if there’s anything worse than ugly, it’s cringe. We’re not even talking about ugliness in appearance here. We’re talking about attitude. You pushed humans out of you, for Pete’s sake. Give your role as mother the respect it deserves, and respect yourself.

Ditch the Hormones

You might be done having kids, and that’s perfectly fine, but that doesn’t mean you have to tank your mental and physical health in the process. You’re of no help to yourself or anyone else for that matter if you’re depressed, moody, not menstruating, and not interested in sex.

Allowing yourself to be free of hormones means you give yourself permission not to be tied to an easy fix – which is really all hormonal birth control is. Being artificial hormone free and letting your natural self shine inside and out could be the best thing for both you and your family. 

Embrace Aging

You may not want to get older, but the truth is that aging is a privilege. Stop whining about how you can no longer do this or that or making cringe jokes about #adulting. Pretending to be 22 in perpetuity on your birthday isn't funny, it's just kind of sad. And if the “wall” hits, hit it back. Find a physical activity you really love, seduce your husband regularly, and be invested in the growth of your children on a daily basis. Aging is a gift some aren’t afforded, and if there’s anything our culture can agree on, it’s that moms are hot even as they get older.

Trust Your Gut

Is Karen from your sweetie’s middle school gunning for your spot as PTA president? Did Sally cut you off on purpose to get to the consignment sale first? Listen to your gut. One of the greatest gifts we have as women is our intuition, or the innate knowledge within each of us that helps guide our choices and decision-making. Use your powers for good, of course, but stop ignoring them!

Let Your Mama Bear Roar

There’s a reason moms are often equated with some of the most fierce creatures in the animal world – bears, tigers, etc. Though our man may be the masculine head of the household (which only enables us to be hotter while he takes care of boring, serious things), women are the neck, and they help lead the head where he needs to go. For that reason, forget all your fake, passive politeness. Know the difference between having good manners and good breeding, and standing up for yourself (or your kids) when it’s important. 

Most of All…

What’s the real secret to being a hot mom? The most beautiful women to us are the women who love their children for all their messes, are clearly in love and adore their husbands, and exude gratitude in addition to confidence. They can’t help but be in good moods, and their attitude is contagious to those around them. Being hot may be a considerable task physicality-wise, but in reality, it starts from within.

Closing Thoughts

Like any quality, being a hot mom is really more about mindset than it is about buying this or that, or wearing a specific thing. Honing your femininity, the maternal qualities you most appreciate about yourself, and your meaningful role as a mother – not to mention taking care of yourself, not just for your kids – ensures that, like any fine wine, you’ll just get better with age.

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